XLIV. HE IS POOR AND HELPLESS
Ever must I remain thus? Thou who art gracious to the lowly, what is to befall me? I am without deeds, without merit of worship, weak and poor inconceivably. Ah, wilt thou fulfil this my impossible wish? Shall I gain those Feet? Whether I am an obedient child or disobedient, is not all known to those Feet? Though her child be disobedient, does the mother forsake it? To whom shall I speak all this? Prasād has said: Except Tārā's, what other name is there I can take? Śiva has cherished this name in his heart. XLV. HE IS A SLAVE IN HIS OWN HOUSE Tārā, my Mother, listen to the story of my woe. Thou who art all supreme, behold this house of mine, how poor a thing it is. Thus do these live, my Mother, with whom I share the house! Five[167] of them are there with five different wills, and all seek nothing but to please themselves. Eight million houses[168] have I lived in heretofore, and now am come again to occupy the house of Man. A fool's part do I play upon the stage of life, the cup of sorrow brimming over. That is reality for me, my Mother! Heed then, O Mother, the word of Rāmprasād. My mind is not at rest. No longer would I live here in this [59]house; those six,[169] the masters of the house, have made an end of me. FOOTNOTES: [167] The Five Senses. Again the joint-family inconvenience. [168] In previous incarnations. [169] The Six Passions.
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