IY. LISTENING PRACTICE
1. Listen to the following text and mark with “T (true)”, “F (false)”, “NG” (not given) the following statements: 1. As a nation, the British are proud of their ordinary sense of humour 2. They believe that it is unique. 3. British people often say that all other people don't understand British jokes. 4. There is no any difference in what people in different countries and cultures find funny. 5. British humour is based on the peculiarities of the English national character. 6. On the one hand, there is a typically dry, almost sarcastic understatement. 7. This characteristic isn’t considered to be the most famous. 8. British people very often use understatement. 9. British people are vulnerable to climate changes. 10. Understatement is closely connected to a more general term: irony. 11. Quite rarely foreigners have to spend some time getting used to British people being constantly ironic. 12. Of course, in some countries it would be unusual to make jokes when you are ill. 13. In Britain it is absolutely impossible to make jokes when you are ill. 14. It is well known that British people like showing their feelings and emotions. 15. They often turn to irony to conceal what they really feel. 16. Both understatement and irony depend a lot on tone of voice. 17. A lot of people, especially foreigners, completely miss the ironic intention of the speaker. 18. A lot of people, especially foreigners, because they are concentrating on the meaning of words and are not listening to the tone of the voice completely miss the ironic intention of the speaker. 19. Quite often toilet jokes are connected with taboo bodily functions. 20. Toilet humour is prohibited for schoolchildren in Britain. 2. Here are some examples of simple English jokes that have been separated from their answers (punch-lines). Try to choose the correct end to the joke from the list below: 1. TEACHER: What do you know about the Dead Sea? PUPIL:.... 2. TEACHER: What do you call the small rivers that flow into the river Nile? PUPIL:.... 3. 1st BOY: Do you always bath in dirty water? 2nd BOY: 4. STRANGER: I'm looking for a man with a wooden leg called Johnson. LOCAL:.... 5. DINER: Waiter! Will my hamburger be long? WAITER:.... 6. 1st FRIEND: I know a cafe where we can eat dirt-cheap. 2nd FRIEND: 7. DINER: Waiter! What's wrong with this fish? WAITER: 8. CORONER: And what were your wife's last words, sir? HUSBAND:.... 9. NERVOUS PASSENGER: How often do planes of this type crash? AIR HOSTESS:.... 10. PASSENGER: Guard! How long will the next train be? GUARD: Now choose the punch-lines for each of the jokes above: a. About six carriages, sir. b. But who wants to eat dirt? c. Dead? I didn't even know it was ill. d. I don't see how they can make a profit selling this chicken at 2p per pound. e. It was clean when I got in. f. Juveniles. g. Long time, no sea, sir. h. No. It will be round and flat, sir. i. Only once, sir. j. What's his other leg called?
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