Avoiding Hypocrisy
Older people who pretend to be morally superior may alienate the younger generation, according to one generation gap expert. In a HYPERLINK " http: //news.google.com/newspapers? id=GfsjAAAAIBAJ& sjid=sREEAAAAIBAJ& pg=7178, 1617120& dq=history+of+the+generation+gap& hl=en" \t " _blank" speech in 1969, anthropologist Margaret Mead, who wrote a book about the generation gap, said that " the young feel we're all hypocrites- every one of us. Parents set themselves up as models even if they aren't. It's as true in a New Guinea headhunters' village as here." According to Mead, the older generation probably used to get away with their act, until the modern press came along. The question of how much of our foibles and transgressionsshould be revealed to younger generations is an intriguing one. Reveal too little, and you risk being seen as one of those hypocrites Mead mentions. Tell too much, and you risk losing any moral authority that you possess. More often than not, however, young people don't need to know that their parents and grandparents have feet of clay. It's not so much a matter of what they want to hear as what they don't want to hear. They don't want to hear that people of the older generation always respected their elders, obeyed authority and were perfect citizens. The younger generation is smart enough to know that that's not true. To avoid being seen as hypocritical, don't paint the older generation as perfect and the younger generation as going to the dogs. The truth is always more complex than that. Find the equivalents in the text: Лицемерие; быть нравственнее; оттолкнуть; приводить в качестве примера; охотники за скальпами; выходить сухим из воды; появляться; недостатки; правонарушения; интересный; чаще всего; слабое место; уважать старших; подчиняться властям; быть хорошим гражданином, лететь в тартарары. Answer the questions: Do older people often set themselves up as models for you? Do you sometimes feel the hypocrisy of the older generation? Give the example. Do you think that in general the older generation is morally superior to the younger? III. Write a composition on Generation Gap using the information and words from the texts I and II. Give your own examples. Express your point of view. Communicating With Adult Children There are circumstances when you must deal with an adult child in a very assertive way, such as when you feel that a grandchild is in an unhealthy situation. Abusive situations must be reported to the authorities. In most other situations, your approach should be quite the opposite. The best way to HYPERLINK " http: //grandparents.about.com/od/grandparentingtoday/a/BridgingGap.htm" bridge the generation gap is to use tact and to defer to the parent’s right to make child-rearing decisions. Special care may be needed in HYPERLINK " http: //grandparents.about.com/od/grandparentingroles/a/Stepgrands.htm" stepfamily relationships. Here are seven guidelines for communicating with your adult children: 1. Don’t let family ties be an excuse for rudeness. For most interactions with your adult child, you must be diplomatic. The guideline here is to act as you would behave if the person were not related to you. Imagine that you are dealing with a younger adult with whom you are close, but who is not a part of your family. It may help you to have a particular person in mind—Johnny, for example. When you are considering saying something to your adult child, ask yourself, “Would I speak this way to Johnny? ” If the answer is “no, ” then don’t say it, or say it in a different way. Our family members deserve at least the same courtesy that we extend to the world at large.
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