THE RELATER

Relaters are supporting and indirect. They are the most people-oriented of all of the four styles. Having close, friendly, personal, first-name relationships with others is one of their most important objectives. They dislike interpersonal conflict so much that they sometimes say what they think other people want to hear. They have tremendous counseling skills and are extremely supportive. People feel good just being with Relaters. Relaters are excellent listeners and generally develop relationships with people who are also good listeners. As a result, they have strong networks of people who are willing to be mutually supportive. While Relaters tend to be relatively unassertive, warm, supportive, and reliable, they are sometimes seen by others, however, as compliant, soft­hearted, and acquiescent.

Relaters seek security and, like Thinkers, are slow at taking action and making decisions. This pace stems from their desire to avoid risky and unknown situations. Before they take action or make a decision, they have to know how other people feel about the situation.

The focus of Relaters is on getting acquainted and building trust. They are irritated by pushy, aggressive behavior. Their theme is, "Notice how well-liked I am." They ask about any proposal, "How will it affect my personal circumstances and the camara­derie of the group?" They are cooperative, steady workers and excellent team players.

The primary strengths of Relaters are relating to, caring for, and loving others. Their primary weaknesses are that they are somewhat unassertive, overly sensitive, and easily bullied. Their ideal occupations cluster around the helping professions such as counseling, teaching, social work, the ministry, psychology, nurs­ing, and human-resource development. They generally make good parents.

In the business environment, Relaters like others to be cour­teous and friendly and to share responsibilities. In a social envi­ronment, they like others to be genuine and friendly.

Asfor environmental clues, Relaters' desks contain family pictures and other personal items. Their office walls have personal slogans, family or group pictures, serene pictures, or mementos. Relaters are high-touch in a high-tech world. They give their of­fices a friendly, warm ambiance and arrange seating in a side-by-side, cooperative way.

To increase flexibility, Relaters need to say no occasionally, to attend to the completion of tasks without oversensitivity to the feelings of others, to be willing to reach beyond their comfort zone to set goals that require some stretch and risk, and to delegate to others.